Mirrors: Sex and Idols (Part 5)
Mirrors: sex and idols
Jennifer Aniston was on my top list for most beautiful women. Achieving her body was my goal, but we certainly have different body types. She is petite, while I have a fairly athletic build with the curves of a W-O-M-A-N. I did not realize in recovering from an eating disorder, my body would become what God had intended it to be, and that was not Jennifer Anniston.
The comparisons made with actresses, the models in my favorite fitness magazines, and even to the little Italian women in my family made me feel so inadequate. I did not feel feminine at all, simply because I was not petite. To me, that was beautiful and what men wanted; tiny, petite, and in every sense of the word cute. People have described me as strong, fierce, and athletic, which is so far from my “ideal.” My idolization of these women made me feel unworthy of a man’s attention until I was “small enough.”
“They worshiped their idols, which lead to their downfall.” Psalm 106:36 (NLT)
This is why the Lord says “Do not worship false idols.” It leads our absolute destruction and prevents the prosperity, joy, and fulfillment that the Lord knows that only He can give us. “Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your hearts desires.” If we really trust in God, we need not worry about who may or may not like us because of our body. That should not even be on our radar. All we are required to do with this body is to take care of it ( 1 Corinthians 19-20). When we are a good steward of what the Lord gives us, He blesses it. I am not saying you will poof into the perfect looking human, that will not happen. Feeding yourself well, exercising a few times a week, and drawing closer to the Lord are some of the best beauty treatments. Looking back on photos, I was 30/40lbs lighter but oh so empty. There is something radiant about photos of me now, and that is the most common complement I receive "there is just a glow about you." I love that! Honoring God with my body and letting him into my heart has made me more beautiful than any amount of exercise or diet plan ever could.
Since then I have realized that God made me the way he did for many reasons, but physically for my future husband. Not only will I be what he needs as a companion emotionally, spiritually, and personality wise, but I will fulfill his sexual desires exactly the way I am. That man will adore every curve, and so will yours. The person God has for you is going to be so attracted to. Stop trying to design and shape yourself for someone, God already did that.
“Oh, how beautiful you are! How pleasing, my love, how full of delights!” Song of Songs 7:6